I was sitting in the living room, tired and still groggy and was thinking about a dream that I had the night before, about being asked to dance and being told that I had to put on a body suit and makeup before I could dance with these other ladies, because "If you are going to dance with us, you have to be READY, no matter how fat you are."
It took me back to several times when men or boys have really been awful to me about my weight. Said terrible things. Then I realized, I don't even know who these people are. Ten, fifteen, thirty years later, they don't know me, either, but I have allowed their words and actions to have power over me.
What would they think if they knew? Most likely, they might say, "I don't even remember that." "I was totally smashed and thought it was funny." "We were just setting up a prank and waiting for someone to walk into it."
I have given power to these words and actions and they have shaped my life. How sad that is. How blind I have been.
Time to stop empowering assholes and live my life.
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